6-10-2023 10:48am

PERSPECTIVES - a regular weekend feature

Dear Liliane,

How do you ask someone that you need to talk to them in person other than saying we need to talk?

Well this is a bit of a loaded question, but here goes....

I want to talk to you about something. Can I come over?
I have something important to discuss with you and I would rather talk face to face - the old fashioned way!
I’d like to bounce something off you. What’s your schedule like?
Hey we haven’t hung out for ages! Let’s get together!

There are a lot of ways to connect with someone. The key is, what’s your agenda and how can you keep them in the loop without manipulating them?

If you really just want to hang out, then tell them you miss their smiling face and ask when could you get together.

But this sounds a bit more serious. ‘We need to talk’ carries a bit of an ominous tone, and some folks will immediately feel anxiety or at the very least, a their radar will be up. Yet, it’s not nice to approach someone as though you just want to talk about the weather, and then blindside them with something heavy. They have the right to honour their own feelings and NOT meet up with you if they are uncomfortable.

So my best suggestion is, take the time to clear your own feelings so that you can speak from the heart. Be direct. Keep it simple. Be willing to accept their response even if it is not what you hoped for. But if you approach them openly and without a bunch of emotional baggage, then you have the best chance at on-going dialogue, whatever it may be about.

Good luck!

Got a question that needs a new pair of eyes?
Email: lily@domesnatureretreat.com

Liliane is co-owner of the Domes Nature Retreat

https://www.facebook.com/domesnatureretreat/

www.domesnatureretreat.com

She is a regular contributor to Alamogordo Town News

https://2ndlifemediaalamogordo.town.news/

She can be heard each weekend on Krazy KALHRadio.org 95.1 FM https://station.voscast.com/5b01bba90dce3